2:52 AM 8/29/04
The winds were shifting, and across the beach the sands drew faces on the shore for the waves to erase. Just like the memories that kept crashing against his consciousness, only to be erased by shattered dreams and painful consequences.
For the past days, pack after pack of bitter cigarettes across his lips and bottle after bottle of gin along his throat, the one thing he tried to erase never budged across his mind--an endless soliloquy into breathless evenings of pain.
During those days, the situation had twisted into full complexity, winding and twisting by the minute. Who could he blame for the confusion, the complexities, and the myriad of consequences that one night created single-handedly? Is it just his happiness to be considered, a decision to be cherished for a lifetime? Or on the other hand, their happiness to be considered, a decision to be regretted for a lifetime?
Eventually, he had decided. He had been so sure about the regret... and now, he was doing the very thing--to regret--among the waves, drowning himself in the vapors of sea spray.
The sun was taking its dusky bath of orange glow...
"Dad, come over here!"
He smiled. There she was, the fruit of his regretful decision. The twisted complexity transmuted into a golden bundle of joy prancing ecstatically over the sands towards his open arms.
"I thought I was the one to come over?" he muttered among her blackish, brown waves of hair.
"You were so slow..." she replied, breathing heavily on his neck. "You smell bad!"
"Yeah. Daddy was thinking of sad things. When Daddy thinks of sad things, he begins to smell bad," he said with a soft smile.
"Then you must not think of sad things, Daddy!"